I know the
story of a Good girl who was the apple of the eye for everyone around her.
She studied well, spoke the correct words; she did the right things and was
always correct. In her youth, she fell in love with a boy who loved her back
equally. Good girls were not supposed to fall in love. She ordered her
stubborn heart to behave.
She obeyed
her parents to the T, as she was a Good girl and married the guy they
chose for her. Her parents’ choice was certainly not the one for her. He abused
her physically and mentally. She clung to the marriage desperately. Good
girls always had a happy marriage, didn’t they?
She left her career to look after the many
kids that were born in the loveless marriage, where she couldn’t help being
raped daily by the man she had married. Good girls obeyed their spouse, didn’t
they? Good girls chose family over career, didn’t they?
She couldn’t
leave him as many of her friends advised her to do. She was a Good
girl. And divorce was not a thing a Good girl did.
Her in-laws
and relatives made her their slave, made her toil daily by asking her help in finishing
their chores. She cleaned for them, baked for them, baby sat their kids and even
looked after them like a nurse, sacrificing her own free time. She couldn’t
refuse anyone. She was a Good girl, wasn’t she?
Daily she
died a little, daily she ate the poison of regret and guilt. Very soon, she
fell into deep depression and was on the verge of a suicide when her friend
came into her life like an angel.
Her friend
told her that to be selfish for her own good was not bad. It was the only thing
that had the power to bring her happiness. She taught her to be assertive, to
fight for her life and rights. Most importantly, she taught her to listen to
her heart. She taught her to start loving herself and let go of all regrets and
guilt.
It was as
if a veil had fallen off. The Good girl realized that in fact she
was not being good at all. Doing all the things that the society had professed
as good was in fact becoming someone’s doormat. She had forgotten to live,
seeking to look good in the eyes of people she didn’t even care about. In the
meanwhile, she had squashed her dreams, her career and even love.
She
understood that she needn’t do anything unless she really wanted to do it. She
decided to follow the messages of her heart. First, she quit her abusive
marriage and resurrected her career. Her kids loved her and supported her
endeavors. Soon she was able to live a happy and satisfied life.
Now tell
me, was she not a Good girl anymore? I believe that she had become the true Good Girl only then.
I know
there are many such Good girls among us who have forgotten to live. May be you know
one or you yourself is one. Open your eyes and look around.
Ask yourself
whether you want to be that Good girl!
Remind that
girl, who walks in the shadows to hide her tears, to be not that Good
girl. Give her wings to fly!
This post is a part of Indispire on Indiblogger. The topic this week was
Give her wings to fly! Beautiful post.:)) indeed a girl should stop caring about being good and rather live a life that makes her happy.
ReplyDeleteYes Sonal Jagetia. Women and girls need to learn to live, to love the self and soar in life.
DeleteBeautiful port... and your blog is awesome..
ReplyDeletehttp://prathamprayaas.blogspot.in/- बिना हाथों की पहली महिला पायलेट – “जेसिका कॉक्स”
Thank you Richa Shukla :)
DeleteBrilliant and powerful story. It's better to be a BAD Girl in people's eyes and selfish rather than be someone's doormat. Happiness matters.
ReplyDeleteYes indeed Vishal. Happiness matters.
DeleteYou've established the point well Preethi...being good doesn't mean being one's slave. A girl has every right to live her life according to her own will.
ReplyDeleteExactly Maniparna. She has every right to live her life.
DeleteVery well conveyed. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Indrani. Keep dropping by.
DeleteI know there are many such Good girls among us who have forgotten to live. May be you know one or you yourself is one. Open your eyes and look around.totally agree with your words .
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading Yogi Saraswat.
DeleteI think this 'Good girl' is all too familiar and resides amongst us. Loved this post.
ReplyDeleteYes... I know more than a dozen I think.
DeleteThanks for reading.
What a heart wrenching and well written post, Preethi! How often we see these 'Good Girls' and feel sorry for them! This piece is such an eye opener. Here's to more power to your pen! Kudos!
ReplyDeleteI wish every such Good girl realize her mistake sooner than later.
DeleteWelcome to my Blog Deepti. Your encouragement and praise means much to me.
Astounding post! Made for an inspiring read. Well done.
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
DeletePerhaps today we live in a society which does not put so many shackles on the girl. Don't girls have much more freedom today compared to the past?
ReplyDeleteThings have changed and girls certainly have more freedom these days. But what if the ingrained thought of becoming the ultimate 'good girl' stop her from pursuing her dreams?
Delete"And divorce was not a thing a Good girl did." Absolutely, that's how the society wants her to be. To remain silent about the abuse, humiliation and negligence she faces in life yet put a smile on face. Brilliant...brilliant writing! very touching!
ReplyDeleteI don't want to be the 'Good Girl' that society wants me to be. I want to be the 'Good Girl' who helps me make the right choices for myself and thus helps me be happy and keep everyone happy.
ReplyDeleteIts a coincidence that I know of a good girl, who underwent all these that you mentioned and now last week I learned that she is planning for a divorce. Now all want to know "why did you wait so long?"
ReplyDelete