Did you know that according to a survey conducted
by Ariel,
More than
2/3rds
of
Indian women feel, there exists inequality at home, between men and women*
76%
of Indian men feel, laundry is a woman's job*
85%
of working Indian women** feel they have two jobs, one at work and
another at home*
73%
of married Indian women feel, a man prioritizes relaxing over
helping with household chores*
More than
2/3rds
of Indian men prefer to watch TV than to do the laundry*
77%
of Indian men, depend on women for doing the laundry*
After marriage, it is the man who sacrifices most. (I can see your frown ladies after reading this line. Whoa, don't quit as yet. Read on! )
He
sacrifices doing his laundry, cooking and even ironing his clothes. The survey
above is simply a reflection of the mentality of Indian men. I have a cousin
who left to join work with just three shirts and then returned home loaded with
12 shirts that needed to be washed after two weeks because he didn’t know how to wash or
iron his shirt. He had cleverly bought new shirts to replace the dirty ones.
I have come to know from my own experience that my husband
too belongs to the majority of Indian men mentioned in the statistics and since I work from home, the
laundry falls under my household chores.
But as it is the washing machine maharaj that does the
laundry in my home, I cannot argue much. Loading the machine itself is a tough and tedious jobs for the male of our species. They believe that by
marrying us, not only have they given us protection of their mighty name, but
also have given us the auspicious job of being their laundry walas for which
even the apsaras in heaven had submitted tender. And it is for life time- no retirement, no hassles.
When I too was working, if I refused to do his laundry it would
kindle a fire akin to the fire of hell and so I would surrender to common
sense. It is always better to do a few minutes extra work than to endure days
of drama. That was my mantra and of course, the secret to my happy married
life.
The Indian male expect wives to be the exact
replica of their mothers. And most Indian mothers pamper their boys and treat them
like fragile china dolls whose entire existence becomes endangered if he washes
his own under wear. And the girls are taught right from the age of five to do
laundry, to give a helping hand in cooking and all duties that are going to
fall into her lot one fine day.
When a girl marries, from the moment she becomes a wife, she is expected to
transition into an expert cook and a perfect homemaker even if she is equally
qualified like her spouse, even if she is working and even if she has not learned any of these things at
her own home.
I remember being advised by the aunties of the society to
learn housekeeping skills instead of spending my time reading books or studying
further.
"Whatever you do girl, one day you are going to end up in a
house washing the dirty under wear of your spouse, just like us.” They had
warned me.
The prophecy luckily didn’t come true as a genie called
Washing Machine had entered our life by then. We handed over all the dirty job to the
Machine and to Ariel. But loading the machine after separating the whites from
the colored and hand washing the delicates are still my job. There is no cure to laziness of
men when it comes to housekeeping work at home. They are the kings of
procrastination.
In the famous book ‘Eat, Pray Love’ by Elizabeth Gilbert,
Elizabeth calls to inform her girl friend Susan that her new boyfriend David did her
laundry.
That proves it, the men are the same everywhere. The David
mentioned above is a rare creature and is hence coveted by all females, the exact
reason why Susan insists that Elizabeth is in so much trouble!
Dear Men out there, can you be Davids at least once in a
while?
I jsut read a post on the same theme .. I am glad i am not in the 76% but I think its coming to uk and living here that has helped me change my mind because I am the laundary woman here in my house Rather I am the maid here ..
ReplyDeleteAlso i feel that there is no shame in doing your own home work ..
Bikram's
This is true. Everyone must have experienced this in every household. Household work is so unequally divided. Rather it is not divided at all. In every household, women do the laundry and other chores. I want to know when did this world started following this.
ReplyDeleteAnd after reading this very thought provoking post I would ask you to visit my blog where I have nominated you for the Very Inspiring Blog Award. :)
I like your outright frank style of writing.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to all that you mention here. My hubby refuses after years of marriage to learn the new washing machine controls, so that I continue doing the honors. ;-)
Well- written.
Thank you Mumbaiiteanu for reading :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Namrata for the honour. I will accept it soon. :)
ReplyDeleteThat is really good Bikram. I wish all men started doing what you are doing. :)
ReplyDelete